Dancing with the darkness

Hades and Persephone in the underworld, interior of a Greek red-figured kylix (cup), from Vulci, c. 430 BCE; in the British Museum, London.

Lost in the dark shadows I cannot see.

Stumbling, trembling, the self preservation has extinguished.

My soul was murder, my dignity robbed as the morning mist rose.

Hades is whispering my name from below.

Sentenced to public examination and humiliation my soul faced a brutal death.

The intensity of living turned me into stone, I call upon the darkness to rise and breathe into this crumbling gravel.

The abyss below my surface has never ending aches and tremors. The earth has opened and swallowed me.

Who calls my name, wants to dance, take my hand to the underworld.

Who is there?

I see it’s you my dear friend and your friends opium, Valium, methadone and sister morphine.

Let’s dance the haze in the shadowy realms of darkness alone and together.

I write this for Beenie Boy, my lover, my friend, my companion. In the darkness time in my life he was there for me. He bought some lights into a very dark space and place. I was raped by an acquaintance and a breakdown followed. My boyfriend at the time gave me drugs to self medicate. Things spiralled further. Eventually my boyfriend went to prison for trying to kill me by driving dangerously and purposely crashing a car so I couldn’t leave him. I felt I lost everything. I was so alone. I was a totally wreck. I found solace with Beanie. He was kind and caring. We made love, did drugs, made love, did drugs then repeated.

Beenie died a gruesome a few years ago. It is believed he was sleeping rough inside a rubbish recycling bin in the days leading up to his death. A rubbish truck collected the rubbish and took it to the the recycling plant. Sadly, his body was found in 30 pieces compressed within a cardboard bales. He was 40.

Look after one another, be kind and caring……..

RIP my old friend xxxxx

Published by Sina Iusitini

Important to me = family, adventure, music, freedom, nature and travel........ I spend my time paddle boarding, kayaking, do charity work and am always keen to learn new things with my family. I love working out and daydreaming. I spend most of my time feeling confused and trying to figure shit out. I’m introverted but most people think I’m the opposite. My ambitions are to be a calmer and free.......have endless adventures and interesting days. Most of all I love my family.

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: