What’s your vice?

Another day and another headache. After many decades of habitual dope smoking I am on my first week of the detox. I have completely gone cold turkey and the physical symptoms my body is experiencing is very overwhelming. With body chills, headaches, stomach aches and mood swings, I’m being to think it’s easier to ween myself off instead of 100% nothing.

My history with illicit drugs is a long one. It started off with a marijuana joint given to me by my dad for my 11th birthday, followed by amphetamines at 16 (again, given to me by my parents) mushrooms and acid in my teens.

During my twenties saw many good times on cocaine, meth, cactus mescaline, ecstasy and MDMA.  The supply of ecstasy was endless as I knew the local manufacturer. We would happily and willingly sample his products before it hit the market.  This was decades ago and times were very different compared to the current atmosphere.  It was more exclusive and not very common and life felt free and exhilarating.

Sadly, my illicit drug choice changed direction after my rape and court case. Very quickly my then boyfriend gave me methadone to replace my Prozac. Ironically he frowned upon my antidepressants and thought it best he proscribed his own medicine. Within weeks I had access to morphine, pethidine, more methadone and opium.  Everything was taken intravenously in a group setting, amongst nature, and on a far away hidden island where no law could touch us.

I live there for over a year, in a  mainly male population, with the odd balls and rejects.  Some of my greatness memories were made here and freedom reigned every moment.  Cooking up was left to the boys, turning the opium into what ever it was (no idea really what crap it was) but I did totally love it and I think it’s my preferred drug of choice.

Anyway, it’s just weed now and hopefully soon not even that.  BTW, alcohol doesn’t  appeal to me.  Just wishing the detox was over and my body recovered. X